Reasons to Avoid Exercise

Feeling better leads to more energy. More energy leads to doing more work.

You will live longer. Again, a troubling development. Living longer can only mean one thing… more bills. More taxes to pay, more groceries to buy, and you know your clothes will wear out eventually. Living longer also puts you at risk of all of your clothes going out of style, forcing the additional expense of new clothing. Research has proven over and over again that people who perform some type of exercise on a regular basis live longer, there’s no denying it. Sure we all know someone that didn’t do a healthy thing in their life and still manage to keep living, but why take that chance?

Living longer leads to more bills.

You will be less stressed. NO STRESS?! How will I get anything done? For some people, the only thing that gets them out of bed in the morning is the stress of potentially losing their job if they don’t get there on time. Stress is fuel for life! Stress let’s you know you’re still alive! When you wasted your time and didn’t study for the big final that was worth 50% of your total grade, what helped you stay up all night and study? That’s right, stress. Reducing or eliminating stress in your life sounds like a recipe for disaster.

Lowering stress levels could spell financial disaster.

Your sex life will increase. For many married people, this is not a good thing. While increasing your sexual activity sounds good in theory, it can really make things complicated. Who will watch your favorite t.v. shows? You’ve invested a lot of time in those characters and finding out what is going to happen to them each week cannot just be ignored. Ratings will go down, shows will be canceled and the actors will be out of work. Just think about that.

Increasing your sex life will put people out of work.

You won’t be as hungry, you’ll have less cravings. What?! Does this sound like a good thing to anyone? I love eating my favorite foods. Pizza, hamburgers, burritos are all part of the most enjoyable things in life. Less cravings will mean a serious decrease in my enjoyment of my favorite foods. Sure I can still eat them with some regularity, but my drive to eat them every single day will go down. That can only lead to weight loss and a decrease in my capacity to maintain my ability to eat an entire pizza on my own.